I've been known to be a very jealous person. But having a good, trustworthy guy like Steve for a husband has chilled me out considerably. I'm not saying that I won't thrown down if another girl tries to mess with my man, but it just hasn't been an issue for me for a while now.

Not only is Steve trustworthy, but I just don't got time to be jealous much anymore. It takes so much work! Do you know how draining it is to conjure up empty accusations and fabricated affairs? To search through countless emails and texts? And now with the constant changing of diapers and washing of spit up and drool off my clothes and body parts, I just don't have it in me anymore. The most I'll attempt these days is an occasional half-hearted "Keep your eyes to yourself!"

But I had a little relapse the other night.

We were out bowling with some friends, and he was off talking to some peeps while I was a few feet away talking to some other peeps. At one point I happened to look over and notice a trio of girls a few feet away. I was in the middle of telling a couple of the guys to go bust a move on those girls when I noticed one of them checking out MY guy. Oh hells to the no! Suddenly I'm practically pushing my guy friends in the girls' direction, offering them up as a sacrifice in exchange for my hubby. And just as suddenly I'm at Steve's side, claiming what's mine. Recognize, beyotches!

We left a few minutes later, and Steve was none the wiser. He had no idea that some girl was checking him out, and no idea that I was pimping out our friends to distract those girls from him. And unbeknownst to him, for the next couple of days I was shaking in my boots. It was not a good feeling. It sucked to visit that jealous, insecure place again. But also? It made me look at him with refreshed eyes. It reminded me what a catch Steve is. Reminded me that he's not just my babydaddy, he's my husband first and foremost. He's the guy I chased for 2 1/2 years. The guy I couldn't believe I was lucky enough to catch and marry and start a family with.

Although it sucked to feel that overpowering insecurity again, I realized a little dose of jealousy might be good for a relationship. It reminds you to appreciate what you got.

But don't get it twisted, I'll still throw down if another girl tries to mess with my man.

Labels: love and war